“No Man is an Island” – John Donne
Yes, no man –or woman– is an island. We should not carry all the burdens of life alone. We should have friends to help us shoulder them.Friends are among the most important people in life as they are the ones who see us through the rough and good times.
However, at times, friendship leads to nothing but misery and heartache. Sometimes, it’s not worth the effort, time, attention, and dedication. However, we become hesitant to do give it up due to fear of hurting the other person’s feelings. How do we deal with this?
Here are the signs that you should give up your friendship already
You’re too dependent on one another
While dependency is one of the signs of establishing a true friendship, sometimes, this can also backfire on you. Remember that too much is always bad. Therefore, too much dependency can be toxic to your friendship. Are you too obsessed with the presence of your friend that you felt function without their presence? If yes, it’s time to let them go.
Of course, we’re not saying that you should go cold turkey right away. The first step towards independence is creating a healthy distance. Then, gradually lift your presence apart until the both of you get used to the distance until when both of you can function properly without depending and checking on each other.
The Friendship is One-Sided
For any friendship to be perfect, balance is key. There should be a ritual of giving and take. However, you should not expect something in return for all the things you’ve done for your friend. While you’re not expecting something in return, your friend must have the audacity to at least give back to you as a sign of gratitude. They may also help you during your rough times because that’s what friendship is. It’s a give and take cycle. If they cannot do that to you at any times, you may be the only one who values your friendship more.
How to handle it
Just like in any relationship, it’s important to tell your friend about what you feel. Tell them that you are confused and that you’re somehow hurt. Try to listen to their side and understand if their excuse is reasonable. From there, figure out what action to take.
Your friend is unsupportive
If your friend is unsupportive, it’s also a sign that they’re taking you for granted. A true friend should always stand by your side at all times. He or she should give you the utmost support to encourage and motivate you in following your dreams. If they are the ones bringing you down, that’s a wake-up call for you. T